Funny Joke
Funny Joke #1...
Dear Dad
A father passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see
the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up.
Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the
pillow. It was addressed, "Dad." With the worst premonition,
he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling
hands.
Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you.
I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to
avoid a scene with Mum and you.
I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so
nice, but I knew you would not approve of her, because of
all her piercings, tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes,
and because she is so much older than I am.
But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant. Stacy
said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the
woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We
share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't
really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and
trading it with the other people in the commune, for all the
cocaine and ecstasy we want.
In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure
for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!!
Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of
myself.
Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to
know your many grandchildren.
Love, your son, John.
P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's
house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse
things in life than the school report that's on my desk.
I love you!
Call when it is safe for me to come home.
Funny Joke #2...
Actually Asked In Court
Actual transcripts from court.
QUESTION: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?
Actually Asked In Court
QUESTION: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?
